FEAR!!!

We, humans, are extremely fearful people. We fear something in this universe or atleast some aspect about existence and suck about it. That’s the truth! So much that every psychologist has been bragging about it and the number of people and the number of phobias registered have been increasing rapidly.

So we have Acrophobia (fear of heights), Claustrophobia (fear of closed places), Aviophobia (fear of flying), Atychiphobia (fear of failure), Necrophobia (fear of death or the dead) and many more!

Now some which I found as surprises are Tetraphobia (fear of number 4), Terdekaphobia (fear of number 13), Nomophobia (fear of being out of mobile phone contact), Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia (can anyone pronounce this?) (fear of the number 666) and many more!

You know anything and the fear of that exists in this universe! So much that there also exists Phobophobia (fear of fears)! 

The point is, Every individual fears something! The others find it logical or ridicule about it. But still, everyone does fear!

I am no exception to this too. I do fear a lot of things. This is why I want to share one thing through this blog.

Firstly, it is normal! Because every fear arises out of a reason! No matter how many people ridicule about it and see this as a ‘weakness’, it is perfectly normal!

But, just because it is normal, you should continue living in that fear? No.

Because the more you fear, the more you end up with it and spoiling everything! For example, the more you fear disappointing people, you will disappoint them more. The more you fear losing things, you will lose everything! The more you fear failure, you will fail more! Not because situations ended up there, but because you ended up seeing only that! And even if nothing of that occurred, but you will end up noticing only that.

Ultimately, you end up being controlled by your fear! So, even when you aren’t alone, you will feel lonely. Even when you didn’t fail, you will term it as a ‘failure’. Even when you didn’t get pain, you will feel pain!

And this isn’t limited to fear of certain aspects! It also applies to fear of something! If you fear spiders, anything that creeps beside you will be a spider to you, even if it wasn’t! If you fear blood, every red liquid will be perceived as blood, when it can be tomato ketchup!

This is a fact! You will face your fear every day, not because it came to you, but because you went to it! And this doesn’t restrict here. Fears can get worse… for you and the people around you!  

So, to end this feeling, is to get over it! Start by analyzing the thing you fear…. Is it that bad? How did you get it? And make a conscious effort, to conquer it! Keep your mind restricted to the positives and keep mumbling it when you feel fear! Try to keep yourself focused there. It helps in a significant way! Because, there is MUCH MUCH more to life, than being restricted to a fear!

An example of that would be Robert Langdon. If you have read or seen The Da Vinci Code or Angles and Demons, you would know him! He is scripted as a claustrophobic. So whenever he enters a closed room or an elevator, he shuts his eyes and thinks positives to himself!

Concluding I would like to say, it isn’t easy. Because you have spent a certain amount of years in that fear! So, even when you think it has gone it can come crawling back to you. But, try being focused!

(P.S.  If you are one of those, who read the above post and wondered how fears can be so serious, trust me, you haven’t seen life! That’s good and bad, both! And if you have even noticed a fragment or element of what I have mentioned, I hope, this turns out to help you and the people around you! )

Happy Diwali

Oh yes, I am very much alive and so is my blog….

Firstly, I would like to thank all the people who kept on asking about my blog even when I offered no new posts…. Your views and suggestions always motivate me to write more….

Now, since Diwali is round the corner… I would take this opportunity to wish each and every one, a very happy, safe and prosperous Diwali (so please excuse the absence of my messages. I did wish here) …. May you have a great one…

Diwali is the festival of lights! Well, this used to be the standard first line in my every “My favorite festival” essay. I am sure every house must have scrapped through its cleaning, lighting, sweets preparations, shopping and the other never ending chores for Diwali.

A few days back, I and my bunch of friends were discussing about this festival- Diwali-then, Diwali-now and how the whole feel of the festival has changed over the years for us.

As a child, my first day of Diwali (i.e. Dhanteras) used to be celebrated at my Nana-Nani’s place. I used to meet my cousins over lunch and then accompany my mother in buying some gold as a part of the tradition.

The second day (i.e. Narakchaturdashi) used to start with my mother waking me and my brother at 5 am, massaging our body with hot oil and Uttana, and bathing us. Then all of us would relish all the sweets prepared. I and all my friends would burst crackers in the society, decorate the entrances with colourful rangolis and diyas and play games the whole day.

The third day would pass by meeting a lot of relatives and exchanging sweet boxes with them. The evening would be Lakshmi-poojan which would go with a simple pooja at home.

The fourth day (i.e. Balipradipada) coincides with the new year of gujaratis. Having lived in a society full of gujaratis, it was a ritual for the young to get up early and visit every house in the building and wish everyone ‘Saal Mubarak’. Every house had a delicacy specially prepared for us. I used to happily oblige with it. The later half of the day used to fly away playing with my friends in the building.

The last day (i.e. Bhaubheez) used to be the best! Lunch used to be at my father’s side family. Every uncle and every aunty would turn up and have a gala-time laughing and teasing each other. My grandmother’s generation would revive their memories and become young with the young. Dinner used to be at my maternal uncle’s place where all my cousins would meet and burst crackers and fire rockets the whole night. I would literally cry every year while departing.

Somehow, a lot of this has changed over the years. I, no longer, burst crackers. I grew out of it very early due to all the air, noise and land pollution it leaves behind (P.S. Not everyone practices this. Noisy crackers have always found their customers.). The ritual of ‘Saal Mubarak’ died down over the years. Visit to relatives and visits from relatives became fewer. Most of my elder cousins left for careers in USA, thus, affecting the gala-time we used to share. The games and all have disappeared and I end up in front of my television for most parts of the day. The 5 am bath has been procrastinated to an 8 am bath. The practice of buying and wearing new clothes has been compromised. The gifts have reduced. The amount of sweets that used to be made has decreased. The rangolis in every entrance has lost its colour. Diwali seems to have lost its spark.

I don’t know if you share the same observation as mine but, for me, the festival of lights has become glum over the years. The tag of ‘festival’ stays but the grandeur seems lost.

Is it all because we have grown up? Our families have increasingly become nuclear? Our social circles have reduced? Longings have deteriorated?

No, I don’t know the answers. And moreover, everyone’s reasons would defer. Some people’s Diwali must have never changed.

Nevertheless, to end this post on a happy note… I would urge everyone to stay happy this Diwali. If you are going through the same, make an honest effort to bring back at the least something about Diwali that you truly miss. And don’t forget to make the people around you happy, because that’s the true essence of a festival!

Happy and Shubh Deepavali…. Have a safe one…. And a wonderful and prosperous year ahead!